Acupuncture, Life Coaching, Ashtanga Yoga in San Francisco
292 Douglass St., San Francisco, CA 94114
I wanted to share some ah-ha’s I experienced while listening to a TED Talk by Shaun Anchor, author of Happiness Advantage. What l love about Anchor’s message is that our cultural orientation around fixing what’s wrong is being invalidated by science. So, if we’re depressed, we go see a so-called ‘expert’ who diagnoses what’s wrong and treats the problem. That way of looking at things may apply well in engineering or technology, but it doesn’t [...] Read more »
The client in my previous blog has begun asking her boyfriend to tell her that he loves her. When she introduced this idea of requesting that he verbally appreciate her, he responded: “I’m with you, aren’t I? If I wasn’t with you, I wouldn’t love you. Isn’t that enough?” Let me just start by saying, “No, that’s not enough.” The honest truth is that we need to know that we are cherished. We need to know [...] Read more »
One of my clients feels badly that she wants her boyfriend to tell her he loves her. She thinks that she shouldn’t need the acknowledgment. She says she should feel solid enough about herself– about how attractive, intelligent, sexy, and special she is–that she shouldn’t need his acknowledgement. She wants to find the hidden secret to confidence, the magic potion that will take away her sense of wanting. Another client is trying to get a new [...] Read more »
Recently a coaching client had been complaining about the various partners that showed up in her life. Mostly she felt a maternal instinct for them, and more often than not, they turned out to be people she had to take care of. She’d become jaded by the various people that’d show up on her online dating service. She’d say, “I know this’ll just turn out to be another one of those ‘energy suckers,’ so why [...] Read more »
I stopped to talk with a student in Mysore class today. I wanted to check in to see how she was doing, if she had any questions or needed a little support or encouragement. I thought the conversation would be a short one, but it turned into quite a discussion. Essentially, she’s been practicing Ashtanga Yoga pretty regularly as of late, but she’s frustrated. She doesn’t feel as if she’s progressing. She doesn’t feel like [...] Read more »
If you are going to communicate everything in your file to another person, how would you manage your communication? Expressing the File It is evident that being accusatory, yelling, finger-pointing, and attacking would be nonproductive. Instead, you are speaking to another person. You need to handle them with both respect and care. Also, be open and honest and say exactly what you need to say without sugar-coating it. Listeners find it annoying if they feel the speaker [...] Read more »
Before we move forward in any relationship where trust has broken down, we need to first clean up the mess that we and others in our lives have made. The unresolved upsets will weaken the foundation of your relationships, making meaningful and satisfying ones impossible. Consider: When the process of making entries into the file started, at some level you knew you contributed something to this breakdown, and you knew you should have communicated your feelings to [...] Read more »
Have you ever been in a situation where somebody else said or did something, and another person reacted in a way that was dramatically disproportionate to what you said or did? Of course! Have you ever been in a situation where somebody else said or did something, and you reacted in a way that was dramatically disproportionate to what the other person said or did? Of course you did that, too. This is called ‘file [...] Read more »
During the honeymoon, everything is so wonderful because you are not dealing with a lot of disappointments. You can be open and intimate with a high degree of trust. So on the scale of openness, intimacy, and trusts, you could say that 100% is available to you. But every entry put in the file displaced the possibility of 100% openness, intimacy, and trust. Think of it like a glass of water that fills to the [...] Read more »
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